You will never have a burnout alone: ??Your relationship, children, friends, colleagues, employees, customers; everyone suffers from it to a greater or lesser extent. Take a look at your partner (your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend); how much does it have to love you to keep on all your misery again and again. To constantly accept those grumpy answers. Listen to those lamentations, to have to cancel another party. How should they understand those 'unclear' fears? You don't even understand them yourself. During the day you do your best to keep your business going and try to keep your employees and customers happy, but at home they are increasingly disappointed in you.
With a burnout you have your hands full to yourself.
You desperately need your energy to stay afloat. To survive and sometimes even to breathe. It's nice if you don't have to put any energy into your relationship and your family. You expect your partner to support you now. That she takes care of your domestic tasks. That it relieves you of the education of your children. That she keeps repeating that everything will be alright. You are married for that! Through thick and thin, in prosperity and adversity!
With burnout it makes sense that your relationship is under pressure.
Relationship problems arise especially if you do not tackle your own problems effectively. It is terrible for your partner to see how you continue to sink. She wants to help you, but she can't reach you. Moreover, your partner is already busy enough with a job, the children and social activities. But whatever your partner does; at least she is NOT your therapist. You can't expect that. Then your relationship problems become even greater than your burnout. Then the safety that you want to offer your family is completely gone. And take it from me; then your greatest fear becomes reality and you collapse completely. You really don't want that.
As a Burnout Coach, I regularly have to conclude that many entrepreneurs seem to like this. You are now using the perseverance that you use to build your business in a negative way. This typical manager behavior is necessary in order to get a burnout at all. You have to ignore the signals for years and pull them even harder. You don't have to listen to your body, your complaints and your partner for years. You have to exhaust yourself for years. Otherwise you cannot get burned out.
The same applies to many relationship problems.
You often also see relationship problems coming long in advance: You have to ignore all signals for years. You don't have to listen to your body and your partner for years. You have to exhaust your relationship for years. Get more energy out of it than put in it. Otherwise you cannot get relationship problems.
I recently spoke to a CEO who told me that his relationship was crumbling. He loved his wife and children. They were everything to him. But yeah; because they both had busy jobs, they didn't take time for each other. And when they were together, they were only talking about problems, the children and the household ...
It is not always clear whether there were relationship problems first or first the burn-out symptoms of one of the partners. That doesn't matter at all. The underlying structure is the same. So the solution too. It starts taking yourself seriously and NOW you start working on yourself.
You just have to work on yourself.
You don't have to work on your burnout, relationship problems, uncertainties or social fears. You just have to work on yourself. But yeah; that is precisely the problem. You slide that out in front of you. You have already proven that, otherwise you would not have had any burn-out symptoms !! Then you had no relationship problems now !! This has long been proven, so save the trouble if you want to deny it or prove the opposite.
To tackle your burnout and relationship problems at the same time, just follow a solid burnout process with me. You may occasionally follow a session together with your partner and together we will create clarity and make agreements. Your partner is also very uncertain about the situation. You do not want to disappoint her, but you are already working on it unintentionally.
You really can't make time for yourself.
As an entrepreneur you are especially busy with your organization, cash flow, finding new customers and achieving consistent growth. But do you remember why you started your business? You didn't want to organize flexibility, financial freedom and your own time? It is of course not the right time to implement those wild plans. It never is! Realize that if you later really fall over with a heavy burnout, then you have to take your distance.
I have already persuaded several directors that they made serious efforts to prevent a (second) burnout. That they started working on themselves before their partner threw in the towel. That is why I love my work so much. It is really much nicer to stay on the right side of the edge. Just call me and let's see how you get your energy and strength back. You may then be doing what you have become an entrepreneur for.
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